It didn’t last. Nothing ever did. Sam was quiet used to the fact and if anything he was lucky enough to have one constant in the form of his brother Dean. He was also lucky enough to have that same brother experiencing the current heartache Sam was facing. Lucky to have someone next to him who could pat his back just as awkwardly and look at him and know without saying one damn thing what he was going through.
Because they honestly hadn’t expected it. Honestly had thought that both angels were free of the host and God and what had once been required of them. All four of them had gone into the last battle thinking that if they some how managed to make it out alive they were going to stick together and make a sort of domesticated go of it. And for a moment, after Sam and Dean had stood over the empty vessel of Lucifer who was once again sealed back in his cage with brand spanking new locks, it seemed like it was going to work. For once in their sorry lives, the Winchester brothers were finally going to catch a break. And while Dean easily and happily encased his angel in a warm and beautiful hug, Sam had turned to Gabriel and merely smiled, his entire being feeling light and carefree when that smile was returned.
Then the next second, they were gone and Dean was hugging empty air and Sam was back on solid, hard, horrifying ground. They had spun around wildly, Dean yelling Castiel’s name until his voice was gone and Sam had sunk to his knees and was stuck staring at earth where two sets footprints assured him that Gabriel had indeed existed in that spot at one period of time.
They were gone and it didn’t take long to figure out that they weren’t coming back. One summoning job and an empty room later had told them that. Dean and Sam seemed to flitter in and out of existence, often only giving Bobby a call simply because they hadn’t talked to him in a month.
It was rough, the months that followed after. Dean silent and stoic during the day only to become a miserable, whimpering mess at night when he dreamed. And Sam rarely every slept because sleeping meant seeing Gabriel, hearing his voice and feeling his touch only to wake up and not find them there. It tore at him and he knew the same thing happened to his brother on the other side of the room.
It had been stupid and foolish to think that they would get a happy ending. Happy endings didn’t exist. Not here. Not in this world. And probably not in heaven either.
Sam still found himself making room for an invisible angel, found himself thinking of pranks to pull on Gabriel when he least expected it, found himself rolling over in bed so he could fold around a warm body that wasn’t there. And even when Sam was consciously reminding himself that Gabriel was gone, that the archangel had been taken from them, from him, he still found him often in the background.
Because they honestly hadn’t expected it. Honestly had thought that both angels were free of the host and God and what had once been required of them. All four of them had gone into the last battle thinking that if they some how managed to make it out alive they were going to stick together and make a sort of domesticated go of it. And for a moment, after Sam and Dean had stood over the empty vessel of Lucifer who was once again sealed back in his cage with brand spanking new locks, it seemed like it was going to work. For once in their sorry lives, the Winchester brothers were finally going to catch a break. And while Dean easily and happily encased his angel in a warm and beautiful hug, Sam had turned to Gabriel and merely smiled, his entire being feeling light and carefree when that smile was returned.
Then the next second, they were gone and Dean was hugging empty air and Sam was back on solid, hard, horrifying ground. They had spun around wildly, Dean yelling Castiel’s name until his voice was gone and Sam had sunk to his knees and was stuck staring at earth where two sets footprints assured him that Gabriel had indeed existed in that spot at one period of time.
They were gone and it didn’t take long to figure out that they weren’t coming back. One summoning job and an empty room later had told them that. Dean and Sam seemed to flitter in and out of existence, often only giving Bobby a call simply because they hadn’t talked to him in a month.
It was rough, the months that followed after. Dean silent and stoic during the day only to become a miserable, whimpering mess at night when he dreamed. And Sam rarely every slept because sleeping meant seeing Gabriel, hearing his voice and feeling his touch only to wake up and not find them there. It tore at him and he knew the same thing happened to his brother on the other side of the room.
It had been stupid and foolish to think that they would get a happy ending. Happy endings didn’t exist. Not here. Not in this world. And probably not in heaven either.
Sam still found himself making room for an invisible angel, found himself thinking of pranks to pull on Gabriel when he least expected it, found himself rolling over in bed so he could fold around a warm body that wasn’t there. And even when Sam was consciously reminding himself that Gabriel was gone, that the archangel had been taken from them, from him, he still found him often in the background.